It is 8.50pm and I an posting again because of a phone conversation I had with my brother today. He asked me to look after his son on the weekend because he didn't want the boys alone while he was at sport. I said I agree they can't be trusted not to get into mischief and then he started. He said if I didn't trust Braiden and give him freedom he would go off the rails like Sam, pointing out that I will have to let him in to parties and drink soon! He also told me he didn't believe Sam was depressed or that dyspraxia had anything to do with sams death. He said kids need to harden up and get over bullying and said Sam killed himself only because of the drugs. I am so Fucking angry I don't care if I never speak to him again! Any body that had anything to do with Sam growing up knew how Fucking hard it was for my baby which goes to show how little time he spent with him! With that said what the hell right does he have giving me his opinion. I have cried since he rang because the thoughtless bastard didn't even care enough to realise that even taking about Sam brings unbearable pain let alone saying horrible shit. So now I am yet again fighting with the lump and anxiety and unbearable sadness which will of course lead me to lay in bed all night telling god I want my baby back, that's its not fair and then feel worse because it won't happen!
No comments:
Post a Comment